He's Here!

E and my mom made it home safely Saturday night. He was pretty excited to see me and his big sister. We picked up dinner on the way home and ate at my parents house. Hubby was playing in a tennis/golf mixer so no sense in rushing home.

We made up for lost time on Sunday with a day filled with Halloween and Tennis!! First we took the kids to this great little pumpkin patch in Argyle. It was late in the season so the pumpkins were not as plentiful as last year in early Oct., but it was still nice and the kids had fun. E love riding the "Chug Whoo Whoo" and looking at all the decorations. He also loved playing on the teeter totter with his big sis. I think that was his first experience on one and he really liked "up"!! After the patch, we ran home to change clothes and it was off to A's last Team Tennis match of the season (yeah, I get my Sunday's back til Spring). She played hard and won her singles match 8-7 (7-2 in the tie breaker). There are now rumors floating the our team might have won first place in our division. If that is the case, we will get to go to an out of town weekend tournament somewhere in the state. More news on that if it happens.

After tennis, it was straight to my parents house to change (yet again) into their halloween costumes and go to the block party. My parents neighborhood has hosted this fabulous Halloween block party for years. We've gone every single year - even when my mom was out of town. We just bring some food and act like we belong. The food spread this year included Babe's chicken and biscuits so I was in chicken heaven!! The kids had the opportunity to do a cake walk and play in the bounce houses. Unfortunately, my little guy had fallen asleep on the way to Mom's and wouldn't wake up for the block party. When he did wake up, he was too grumpy to do anything.

Luckily, by the time we left and headed to the Country Club for Trunk or Treat he was awake and in a better mood. He loved his "Dash Rob Parr coshume" (Dash from the Incredibles) and looked mighty cute if I do say so myself. Big sister was a Japanese girl (dark wig, kimono style dress, powdered face). They both had a great time at Trunk or Treat. E had no problem figuring out how to get candy from folks. A was happy because two of her fifth grade friends showed up and the three got to go on the Hayride together.

By the time we touched down at home at 8:30, it felt like we'd been gone from home forever. Lots of photo ops for the scrapbook though so I wouldn't change a thing!! Speaking of scrapping, I'm going to my fav scrap hangout on Saturday with my friend T and I cannot wait!! We haven't been there in ages due to scheduling conflicts so it will be nice to get out and get something accomplished in my neglected books!! Happy Halloween everyone - stay safe!!

He's almost home

My baby boy comes home tomorrow at 5:30 and I'm really excited about it!! He's had such a good time with "G" and Mom said she found "G" crying this morning because they were leaving at noon today to head back to my uncle's house. He lives less than two hours from the airport whereas my grandmother lives at least 4 hours from the nearest airport. I know it's hard for my mom to leave her mother again. These trips are such a mixed blessing - they get quality time together but it's so hard to say good-bye.

To make time fly a little faster, some of my friends are coming over tonight to scrapbook. Looks like there will be four of us so it should be fun. I made some snacky food and cleaned my house last night so all I have left to do tonight is enjoy their company, eat some food and get working on my scrapbooks. A has a tennis mixer tonight and I'm kicking dear hubby out until her mixer is done so us girls have the house to ourselves. Felt a little guilty about not saving this evening for quality time with hubby since he's been traveling all week but I needed a scrapbook fix and he understands that! He and I had lots of quality time together this summer while the kids were in WV with my mom so that has to last us until next summer. :-)

I know I'll spend tomorrow counting the minutes until it's time to head to the airport. I cannot wait to see his face when they get to baggage!! The best part about sending them away on vacation is the hugs you get when they come back home!

Boys

My daughter has been boy crazy from a very early age. When most little girls thought boys had cooties, my girl thought the boy at her table in preschool was "really cute". I guess I cannot blame her, I remember being pretty boy crazy myself at an early age. Of course, I was all about C. Thomas Howell, Ralph Maccio, Scott Baio, Leif Garrett, Matt Dillon and so many more. I think I started buying up Tiger Beat and Teen Beat at about the age of 10 or 11. I posted those tear out 8 1/2 x 11 glossy photos all over my door (the only place my mother allowed posters). At any given time, my affections would change and so would the boys on my door.

My mother handled my crushes pretty much the same way I handle A's. She allowed me to have my little fantasy world and pretty much figured the rest would work itself out. I do worry about A though. I remember what it was like to be the girl that all the boys confided in. I was the go-to man between the boys and their crushes. I was never the object of affection - I was their buddy, their pal, their confidante. It stunk. I see A falling into that same predicament. I can tell how much it bothers her at times but, like me, she tries to pretend she's okay with watching all her friends pair up while she coordinates their relationships.

I hope A finds a way to balance her affection for boys with her ability to be their friend. I think the fact that I was always "the friend" helped make me who I am today. I am fortunate today to count two great guys as a couple of my closest friends. One friendship started because CS liked one of my girl friends. I arranged for the two of them to 'hang out' at the country club pool and they 'dated' for most of the summer (if you call flirting and talking on the phone - dating). Their relationship ended when the summer came to close but he and I have been close friends ever since! Over 25 years! I hope A finds some good boy friends like this.

Things changed a bit this week when she learned that a boy in her grade actually liked her and, according to sources, has liked her for over a year but was too shy to tell her. You should see the pep in her step, the smile on her face every time I mention his name! She says she likes him back but isn't ready to be someone's girlfriend (that's my girl). I'm certainly not ready for her to be someone's girlfriend but I have to admit that I'm pretty excited for her to finally be object of someone's interest!! A mother wants her child to be smart, athletic, attractive, popular - come on - admit it - you want your child to be everything you weren't!! Whether you are subtle about it or not - your child's crowning achievements make you feel like a success and their failures like they are your own!

Parenting is like walking a tight rope - balancing their needs and desires against your own. If you wanted to be a primo ballerina but never achieved that goal and your daughter shows the slightest interest in dance - you are instantly dreaming of the day you see her on stage dancing Swan Lake in front of the masses. Yeah, that's my daughter up there in all her glory!! Fathers dream of their son's scoring the winning touchdown at the Super Bowl. We are all guilty of it. Some parents push those dreams on their children and others sit back and quietly cheer as it all falls into place w/o having to look like you were pushing!!

I have lots of dreams for my children but I'm a bit laid back about helping them to achieve those goals. Sometimes I think I should be a bit more pushy but that's just really not my nature. Sure, I get frustrated during a tennis match when A is not playing her best but I'm also the mom that does a little cheer in her head when a tennis match is rained out even though I know the match is necessary toward her goal of greatness. But when it comes to affairs of the heart, I admit I push this more than any other aspect of my daughter's life. I am constantly asking about the relationships in her class - who likes who, who is mad at who? Maybe it is because of my own early shortcomings when it came to being a "girlfriend"? Maybe it is because I'm afraid my daughter's heart is breaking inside every time a boy she likes admits he likes one of her friends. Liking boys stinks no matter your age! They can break your heart whether you are 10 or 110.

So here's to all my friends with daughter's......I hope you push them in the right direction w/o leaving any permanent marks. I hope you always remember how hard it is to be a little girl and hold their hearts gently in yours and apply the scotch tape to all the necessary places when they think it's broken. Raising a daughter is an uphill battle that we can win.....because we were once little girls and we made it over those same hills and found mountains on the other side!

Be Good Sweet Boy

So I said good bye to E this morning as I left for work. He's heading off to WV today with my mom to see my uncle's family and then to see my Grandmother or "G" as he calls her. He is such a good traveler and was really excited about going to see "G". I am, of course, extremely bummed that he will be gone for ten days. He is so much fun and brings so much joy to my life that ten days without him here seems like a lifetime. However, I would never keep him from going with Mom because the time he gets to spend with my grandmother and my uncles and cousins is invaluable!! I want him to have the same wonderful memories of his extended family that A had. She made this trip with Mom every year until she started Kindergarten. Then for a few years, Mom got to go alone. My grandmother loves toddlers so she is over the moon about having E there for a visit. He talks 90 miles an hour now and she can't understand anything he says but she will just laugh and he will just keep talking.

Tonight I have a Girl's Night Out with my TC friends and I am really looking forward to the distraction. Even dear hubby thought it was a good idea for me to get out of the house tonight so I didn't spend it pining for my baby boy. A is always excited to have us to herself again but even she was a little sad this morning when she told him good bye. She will get over the sadness real quick though and expect me to take her to the movies, bowling, etc. the whole time he's gone. She really only gets "mommy" time on special occasions these days to this time is good for us too.

Here's hoping I survive the next 10 days til my baby comes home....

Being Grown Up Stinks

Yep.....I've come to the realization that I'm tired of being the adult all the time. I want that time back when nothing phased me. I could float thru life without a care in the world and let my parents be the ones to deal with all the hard stuff in life. They did a bang up job of protecting me from the bad stuff. Now, I'm the one protecting my kids and dealing with the issues of life head on.

After losing my mother in law and two grandfathers in the past few years, I've come to realize that part of being the grown up is handling the loss of loved ones with dignity and respectability. Sure you grieve, sure you cry but you are only allowed to do so at the appropriate times and in the appropriate manner. It's not appropriate to bust out screaming and crying at your desk at work. It is not appropriate to cry your way thru Walmart. Instead, you try your best to bite the inside of your lower lip, keep the tears in check and pretend you have no feelings. Then when you are alone in your car, alone at your house, hiding in your closet - you can let the tears flow but still not to the full degree that you'd like. You still have to worry that your spouse, your children or a stranger might catch you in the act and that is just not acceptable adult behavior.

Kids have it good. If they lose something or someone they love - they can throw a fit, bawl their eyes out, scream at the world for letting them down! If they are physically or emotionally hurt - no one has to guess how a kid feels about it. You will know how they feel in less than 2 seconds and you will not be allowed to forget it until they are ready to let it go themselves.

When I lost my grandfather in May, I wanted to throw myself on the floor, kick and scream to the heavens about how unfair it was that God took him before I was ready for him to go. I never did that. I found out he was gone while I sat at my desk at work. I didn't even cry because I didn't want my co-workers to see weakness. I controlled my emotions, kept my tears in check and held on until I could leave at 4:30 and then cried the whole way home in the car. It was still a controlled cry because I was worried of what the other drivers might think if I were truly bawling. At the viewing and funeral, I held it together because I'm the oldest grandchild and I wanted my brother and cousins to feel that they could turn to me if necessary. I didn't want them to see me fall apart. I didn't want them to see me let go of all the emotions pent up. I certainly didn't want to make my father or grandmother cry so I was strong. I noticed they were both doing the same thing. A wonderful man had left our lives, a man who had spent his life always being there for his wife, his sons and his grandchildren. A man who never told any of us 'no'. Here he was lying in that casket and we were all trying to pretend everything was going to be fine. Every now and then, you would see someone silently sobbing or see a few tears run down a cheek but no one ever just lost it - except my 14 and 17 yr. old cousins and that was acceptable because they are just kids.

I know I've reached that age where there will be hard times, loss of loved ones, and bad things and I know that I will be the adult and hold it together and be stong for my kids, my husband, my parents, my cousins, etc. All I can think when that realization strikes me is that being a grown up really stinks......somedays I just want to be the kid!

Garage Sale II

Well, we survived another garage sale. Friday was so slow that we were beginning to worry that we were wasting our time. However, Saturday was pure madness and money was made by all. My dad made $25 off of a golf club. My daughter made $20 because we give her all the change at the end of the sale. Mom and I split about $750 which is pretty darn good considering the most expensive item we sold was the $15 High Chair. There was the bonus of selling a bunch of broken 14k gold chains to a dealer that came by. He paid $10/gram for 14k gold and a little less per gram for 10k gold. I found 2 small broken chains, a gold nugget ring that a former boyfriend had given me in HS and a small pinkie ring that used to have diamond and sapphires in it but those had long ago fallen out. Mom had one broken chain and a nugget pendant. The guy weighed the stuff and gave us $160 cash. Now this is jewelry that would have either spent the rest of our days gathering dust in a jewelry box or ended up in the trash during a good cleaning. Instead, we made $160. Not too bad!! Of course, I was skeptical that this guy was legit but he paid in cash and it doesn't look counterfit.

It was hot in that garage this weekend but with almost $400 cash in hand - I'm not complaining too much. I will use some to have the carpets cleaned this week (boy do they need it now that E has discovered how to pull off his own Pullup and run around naked). I also put some aside for a much needed haircut. Then I'll spend the rest as needed 'til it runs out. I already used some last night at JoAnn's to buy a new vase for my bedroom (to replace an old flower arrangement) and on a few small scrapbook items!

Now if I could only find the time to actually scrapbook again.......

Garage Sale Time

Mom and I are preparing for our annual garage sale. We have been having garage sales together since our days in Waxahachie when I was in HS. Garage sales in Hachie were great because you sold absolutely everything - difference was you just didn't make much money because every thing went for ten cents or a quarter. There was a lady that cleaned the house across the street who would come over every year and tell us to save everything we didn't sell. She would show up the day of the sale as we were shutting down and she would give us $50 for everything remaining - site unseen! After Mom and Dad moved out of Hachie, I tried to have a GS by myself in Denton one year. What a joke. One of my friends brought up a load of stuff he wanted to sell but he couldn't stay to help with the sale. It was big pieces like a desk, dresser, etc. I sold the stuff to a neighbor across the street that I barely knew who promised her husband would come back to pick up the stuff later. Well, days went by and they never came over and were never home when we knocked. This stuff was big enough that we couldn't park our cars in the garage and in our town it was not a good idea to leave your cars out at night. We finally moved the large pieces to our front porch and covered them w/ plastic. They still didn't come get them. One night, hubby and a friend took them over to these folks driveway and left them there. They never said a thing to us about it?? Odd folks in Denton!!

I even tried a garage sale in TC one year but with my garage at the back of the house, folks were either afraid to come back there or too lazy? I didn't sell much of anything and made very little money.

Then Mom and I started having sales at her house in Southlake and realized this was the ticket!! People come and clean you out and will pay more than they would in Hachie for stuff. We usually each walk away with about $400 from our yearly sales. My dad makes fun of us that we put so much time and effort into such a silly thing but hey, $400 is $400 and no matter how you slice it - I can use that money!!!! He gets irritated that his car sits outside for 3-4 nights risking theft or damage so that we can make a little money. I think he just likes to irritate my mother which is why he complains so much.

The worst story from our many sales in SLake is the recliner story. A lady comes to the sale early one Saturday and gives us cash for a big leather recliner that Mom was getting rid of. She promises to come back later w/ a truck to pick up the chair. Well, she didn't come back that day. We waited and waited and finally pulled the chair (which weighed a ton) back into the garage and closed the sale. Two weeks went by and we didn't hear from the lady. Finally, my brother carried this monsterous chair back to the bedroom (which irritated my mother to no end to still have this thing). A few days later, a couple shows up at the door for the chair. The lady knew she bought it but couldn't remember which house she bought it from so she'd been spending the past few weeks driving around with her husband looking for the house. All's well that ends well.

Another year, a lady that cleaned houses in Mom's neighborhood stopped by the night before the garage sale because she knew folks were setting up and wanted to do a little 'pre-sale' shopping. She had family in Mexico and wanted to buy lots of stuff to send home to them. She practially cleaned us out before the sale. Problem was, the total of her stuff was over $400 and she only had $100 on her. She gave us the $100 and left all the stuff bagged up in the corner. The first day of the sale came and went and she didn't show up. Half way thru the 2nd day, we felt like a lot of good stuff was not being sold because we were holding it all for her so we started pulling stuff out of the bags and selling it. We didn't sell everything but did sell off some of the stuff. The day after the sale, she shows up for her stuff. She still didn't have all her money but that was okay because we no longer had all of her stuff. We felt bad for selling it but didn't want to be stuck w/ it all either. She bought what we had left and had enough to pay for it between her deposit and the rest of the money she'd brought.

Between these two stories and more , we learned some very valuable garage sale lessons: 1) Always take payment in full up front and in cash!! Period; 2) Never let them leave the item for later w/ a promise they will be back that day; 3) If they do leave to get a bigger vehicle to haul something in - give them your address so they can find you again; 4) Never take a check unless it is from someone you know and can hunt down later; 5) Do not let folks pressure you into coming down too much on the price of the bigger items because the next person that walks in the garage might have been willing to pay more!!; and, 6) Learn Spanish!!

I'm really hoping this sale goes well as I've already hired Dalworth to come clean our carpets next week and I'm counting on this money to pay for the cleaning. I also would love a little extra for some scrapbooking money!! I can never have too much scrapbook money!